Thirsty Thursday: Part 3

Hannah was born in July 2006 and my life changed forever. That little girl was born to save my life and for that, I will always be grateful to her and my God for her! I know every mother thinks their child is special, but there is truly something different about mine.

I changed for that little girl, and I haven't looked back.

She was about 2 when we started attending church again, and honestly, I did it to please my mom.

I remember listening to the preacher in awe.... and one thing caught my ear..

He started to tell a story about these three stray dogs that he and his wife took in and how they depended on him as their "master" 

I don't remember the rest of the story because as soon as he said that I started having a personal conversation with God.... and it became very overwhelming.

The next year I felt like I was really growing in my relationship with God, and I really felt He was helping me be a better mother and caregiver. Even though my husband and I had a good relationship, I knew it could be better. I just didn't know how

I was baptized May 17, 2009 and it truly was the most spiritual moment of my life. I heard a woman speak one time about how she felt like she was being scrubbed clean from the inside out, and I can totally agree with her!

What my relationship with the Lord has done for me is beyond words. I've come to learn that God doesn't use our lives before salvation to show His might. He uses us before and after salvation to show just how awesome, how powerful, how forgiving, how mighty He is.

College was great and it wasn't too much of a struggle because I took it all in stride. 

Even though I was still in college, Hannah was four I felt called to have more children so we started trying for another. In March 2010 we found out we were pregnant with our second, but 8 weeks later we miscarried. 

Still to this day I can't describe the physical pain it caused me. I was so confused because I couldn't understand why God would do this to me... Why would he take a child from me? He knew how badly I wanted another child. He knew how long I had prayed for that baby.

I found such comfort in my Lord. He used that baby to bring me closer to some amazing women and allowed us to be an encouragement to each other. I will never know why that baby was taken, but it fills my heart with joy to know that he/she never had to know the sadness of this world. That precious baby is at home with our real father. 

We kept trying and in July 2010 we were expecting again! Praise God! 

During fall of 2010 I was pregnant, student teaching, taking care of a husband and four year old, when my grandfather fell terribly ill. My precious granddaddy had always had heart trouble, but he shown his brighter than anyone I knew! 

In March 2011 baby Maddie was born! she was so teeny I was scared she would have to go to NICU, but once again it was just an opportunity for God to show His awesome power through such a little baby. She's still teeny, but has the biggest, most amazing personality of any other child her age.

Six weeks later, I graduated from Troy University with my degree in Elementary Education. 

I still haven't found a teaching job yet, but I have full confidence that my Lord will provide in His timing. It's really hard most days because I wasn't made to be a stay at home mom. I was meant to TEACH! I was meant to ENCOURAGE! 

Shouldn't I be able to encourage my family first? Shouldn't I be able to support my family first? If I can't act out my love for my family how can I do that for someone else's child?

In July 2012 my precious granddaddy passed away. I stumbled upon the Duggar show where Jim Bob's dad passed away and I called my husband in tears asking "Do you think God is trying to prepare me?" The morning he passed was such a glorious morning. I woke up about 4 and went for a walk in the rain. If you know me, then you know I don't exercise... I just had one of those FEEELINGS (in my Dave Ramsey voice)

Oh the rain, what a cleansing rain. I was at such a peace that morning. We mourn for the earthly loss of his presence and I pray for Nana everyday who lost her best friend and husband of 56 years. 

I have witnessed just as much pain before and after I accepted Jesus into my life, but there is no question that I am different person because of His love. There is no question that I see things differently.

Because I have a love like no other for Jesus, it's so much easier to forgive. It's so much easier to love. it's so much easier to serve, because He has transformed me. My husband and I will be celebrating our 7th wedding anniversary in January 2013 and he is my earthly rock. He has always worked so hard to provide for this family so I could continue my education and stay at home with the girls. He truly loves me unconditionally and supports every adventure I want to be a part of. We still have our moments and we aren't perfect. Jesus was the only perfect person to walk this earth. But because we want to set a good example for our children and because we want our marriage to work, we put Him first. There is still ungratefulness in our marriage (at times), on both sides, but we made a commitment to each other before we even made our vows, before we were ever Christians, that we would never get divorced. It can be so frustrating trying to reason with a person who has a different mindset from you, but that's where patience and forgiveness can really help and heal a marriage. We have the same goals for our family, but the petty day to day decisions can get in the way. We have a long way to go, but I am so proud of how far we've come. I know that sounds hokey, but he married into my hokey-ness. so its alright. This man is such a huge part of my testimony because he saved me. If it weren't for him I wouldn't have my children, who bring me so much joy! All he expects of me is to love him unconditionally, fill his belly at dinner, and keep his house clean. I know that sounds so old fashioned, but I will gratefully support and encourage him for the rest of my life. After putting up with me for so long he deserves it. He serves people all day long (he's in law enforcement) so I know it makes him feel special to be served when he gets home. 

A man from our church is starting a college and 20 somethings worship service and I am so proud to be a part of that. I know that I have a much different college experience from everyone else, but the passed year or so my heart has felt led to inspire, encourage, and love this age group because I know how hard this season of life can be. If someone had been there for me when I was younger and truly made me feel like I wasn't damaged goods, then things might be a little different today. But then again, everything happens for a reason, don't they? ;)

Thank you so much for reading about my entire journey!! I know it was a long one! I pray my testimony can encourage you today and fill you with hope :)

Have an amazing day!

-Whitney